I actually am a douche

I sat down today to write a parody of Walking in a Winter Wonderland. I replaced the word "walking" with a certain F word that means doing it. A couple of lines in, I thought "this is actually too gross."

So today, December 13, 2007, it is official. I am actually a douche. I censored some bad language by deciding not to write the song.

But I look at it like this: it was being gross just because I thought of one part of the song earlier today that I found funny.

He’ll say "are you married"
we’ll say "no man"
then he will call us sinners that should drown

Which I think is funny. But in order to do it as a song, I’d have to... well, do the whole song. And I can’t come up with anything that isn’t absolutely gross as hell. And I didn’t want it to be gross. I wanted it to be a song about having sex in the snow. That is not gross. Just stupid. But in order to do that, the lines have to be gross. At least to rhyme with the original song. And I think good parodies rhyme with the original song for the most part.

But the lesson for today is that gross isn’t always funny.