I'm going to smack you and call you Gwenith.

Things started with an overabundance of things happening in the news. I wish that some of the stuff that was happening would have happened last week or didn't happen at all. Lindsay Lohan is suing a baby commercial, which I can't believe. She will not win, especially given that SNL exists.

First video was The Vajazzler. It's a commercial for a fictional product that puts jewels on your vagina. This process, "Vajazzling," is NOT fictional. People are really just that stupid. Also, I made mine to… Continue

Karen has always been pretty cool to me, and I could live vicariously through her if she met Conan. I will most likely never meet him, though I look up to him a great deal. Continue

A pharma company just contacted me today about posts on my closed old-school style message board. They claimed to me that these posts were infringing their trademark, and that I could be liable. This is what I wrote back:



Sir, I do not appreciate this email. First, I don't want spam on my site, which is why my original forum is closed in lieu of a Twitter-based forum. Too much spam is on it. It is possible to access it still, but from the main page you can not. Do you think I want a b… Continue

So what do you think about when you're pooping? I think about probably the most insightful things I think of through the day. I think about how what I am doing right now will probably be what I do most of my life.

No, not pooping.

Comedy. I've really deeply entrenched myself in comedy. It's weird, actually; I think that I'm actually a pretty mellow and even mildly serious person. When I think, it doesn't really come from a funny place. I just go on little daydreams that often fabricate somethi… Continue